Never Say Goodbye.

Posted on May 15 2008 » Permalink

I’m sorry, I haven’t updated in a while. I haven’t visited your sites too.

It’s because my grandmother died last Saturday and I’ve been staying in Loyola Chapels in Guadalupe to be with my Lola and other relatives too. Interment will be tomorrow, 11AM at the Manila Memorial Park in Parañaque.

I can’t believe it, really. I still can’t accept the fact that she’s gone, the woman who carried me and held my hand all through out my childhood. When she had a re-touch of make up last Tuesday (she had to because her make up was already fading), I touched her hand, caressed her head. She was hard as cement. And even then, I still could not bring myself to believe that she can’t be with us anymore. It’s like at the back of my head, I know that when I wake up, she would still be here with us and laugh with us. She would still crave for Mentos. She would call me her favorite grandchild over and over again.

I had a dream about her last night. I was telling her that the thought of her being dead is just a dream, and the reality is that she is still alive. I touched her skin, and it was still soft and warm like it used to be. She was alive. And she will always be alive in my memory.

Hiatus.

15 Responses to “Never Say Goodbye.”

  1. astrid of http://as3d.info
    May 15th, 2008 at 1:20 pm

    goodbyes are never easy lalo na kung biglaan. I don’t know what to say to make you feel better. :(

    be back soon, sis. Just think that he’s in a happy place now, where nobody could hurt him and where he has eternal bliss…

  2. Mikyu of http://munchkinswamp.co.cc
    May 15th, 2008 at 2:58 pm

    condolence sis. parang ang lungkot talaga nyan. na-feel ko emotions mo. :|

  3. Aldren of http://mystar.starry-dreams.net
    May 15th, 2008 at 3:55 pm

    haven’t gone here for a while…

    well, condolence.. just always pray for your grandmother! ^^ she will be surely happy with the Lord!

    hugs and kisses
    -aldren-

    Aldren’s last blog post..What Happens in Vegas?

  4. Danielle of http://deadair.uni.cc
    May 15th, 2008 at 8:22 pm

    Oh my gosh. :( I’m so sorry sis. :(

    Alam mo sis, I feel your pain. Almost six years has passed, hindi ko parin matanggap na wala na si grandma ko. I was so close to her rin kasi. Tapos her passing was a shock for me. Kasi I was in school, tapos bigla akong tinawag ng tita ko at sinabi na pupunta daw kami ng Manila… Un pala namatay na si grandma. :( Haaay. Condolences sis. :( I’m so sorry for what happened. :(

    Peace, much love, respect

  5. Ayiene of http://intoxxicated.net
    May 15th, 2008 at 9:22 pm

    Condolence ate.
    Kung tutuusin, mahirap talaga mawalan ng love one. Napakahirap pero kailangan nating tanggapin. :) Cheer up ate. Marami pang manyayari sa’yo and i’m sure gagabayan ka ni grandma mo. :D
    Ayiene’s last blog post..My Loves.

  6. April of http://haliparot.co.cc/
    May 16th, 2008 at 10:25 pm

    Sorry to hear this Ate. Again, condolences. Everything will be okay.
    God just wanted to be with your Lola. She’s still there, guiding you all the way. :)

  7. Keiyt of http://paintmy-world.com
    May 17th, 2008 at 1:51 pm

    Condolence, Nika.I’m sure she’s fine :)
    I’ll pray for her soul. ILY dear. :)
    Keiyt’s last blog post..Site related updates.

  8. Khayte of http://pinktwilight.uni.cc
    May 17th, 2008 at 4:03 pm

    I know what you felt that time and I can empathize with you Nikka. I felt and thought the same way too when my grandpa died. My condolences. :(
    Khayte’s last blog post..Product of boredom

  9. Aisha of http://screamozell.com
    May 17th, 2008 at 5:25 pm

    condolence sis
    sorry bout that
    naalala ko 2loi lolo ko :(
    super close ksi ako sknya
    shocking lng dn sob.

    Aisha’s last blog post..Barbie lens :)

  10. XTY of http://stochastik.blogspot.com
    May 19th, 2008 at 5:50 pm

    Condolence. I’m sure she’s watching you from heaven. :)
    XTY’s last blog post..Let’s leave this town and run forever.

  11. Mikyu of http://tensaii.co.cc
    May 19th, 2008 at 11:17 pm

    condolence again sis. :|

    btw, lumipat na pala ako ng site sis. paki-change na lang ng link ko. i already linked you there. thanx! :D

  12. masaya of http://krayolangputol.org
    May 20th, 2008 at 7:52 am

    i’m sorry about your lola. condolence nika.

    i’m sure she’ll watch over you.

  13. shane of http://candydoll.luv.ph
    May 20th, 2008 at 10:16 am

    speechless…

    ano ba sasabihin ko? uhm… masaya naman siya sa heaven at binabantayan ka…

    shane’s last blog post..It’s Good to be Loved!

  14. Eka*Mika of http://wordkill.org
    May 21st, 2008 at 9:28 pm

    Goodbyes are never easy. I cried so hard when my favorite grandmother passed away. I cried so hard. Especially also, when her husband died before her as well. It was one of my very gloomy days. Condolence nik. We’re all here for you. And yes, I know how it feels like, losing a grandma. You’d go in denial at first. But I know later on, you’ll get to accept that… Take care. I know that wherever she is right now, she’s in a happy place and she’s watching over you and your family.

    Eka*Mika’s last blog post..Frustrated.

  15. Gayle of http://kissmemwah.net
    May 22nd, 2008 at 10:25 am

    Condolence Nika ang hirap talaga igrasp at marealize na wala na ang isang taong mahalaga sa atin. Ganyan ako nung nawala ang tita ko eh…

    Gayle’s last blog post..Scrap

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